Silence

Silence.

                Silence, it isn’t something we are used to any more.  I am never in silence.  Always there is the radio or an audio book or music.  Even when I sleep I have and electronic white noise maker that I can’t sleep without.  So for a while today I thought I’d just sit in almost silence.. except for the refrigerator and the furnace and the two cats fighting.. ok still no silence, but I turned off the electronics. (please note that when finished I immediately had to turn it back on and blog about the experience!)  Before the cat fight I just gave my full attention to my tea, the smell, the steam drifting in front of my face as I lifted the cup.  The flavour of my breakfast.  The light from the whirling snow outside. And I thought, “ I need to do this more, just be present and mindful”  even during the cat fight I got mindful of those two little beasties that I love so much.  I never really thought about what they do all day when we are not home.  I figured the just slept mostly.

 It seems like I have very much lost the ability to just be present in the moment.  Always switching between cell phone and facebook and TV or radio..  I did a break from TV a couple of years ago, around the time I think when I started the blog and now I am thinking maybe I need a break from all electronics, except I’m not sure I can!  I am currently being trained as an addiction recovery program facilitator and I have been worried that may be I wouldn’t be good at it because I have never struggled with addiction, but clearly I am addicted to my cell phone and computer.. ok I am addicted to the internet.  The catch is that this program promotes abstinence, but I need these tools to do my job.  It would be like a wine taster alcoholic trying to only taste wine at work.. I think that I would just spend a lot of my work day binging on facebook and internet.. clearly this is something I need to think about!

For now I guess I could work on today.  Taking time today to be mindful.  Enjoy the mid week storm day, do some meditation, just be.  No planning, no wishing, no worrying about tomorrow.